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He turned to the other two men and commented “I graduated from the University of Finance and they taught us to be clean!”The lawyer finished, zipped up and quickly wet the tips of his fingers, grabbed one paper towel and commented “I graduated from the University of Criminality and they taught us to be environmentally conscious!”The bartender zipped up and as he was walking out the door said “I graduated from Hospitality College and they taught us not to piss on our hands!!A young pastor who normally rode a bike was walking despondently down the street when he came upon an older more experienced pastor.The older pastor could see his young friend was troubled deeply. “What is bothering you my son?” he asked. “Well it appears a member of my congregation has stolen my bike” he replied.The elder said “If I may give you some advice you might get your bike back. Next Sunday preach on the 10 Commandments and when you get to ‘Thou shall not steal’ really emphasise it”.Well the next week they. . well, I didn't know the word orgasmic back then, but that was pretty close to how I felt. I leaped out of my chair and hugged daddy so tight he had to grab my arms to breathe. "I promise I will be extra good, daddy. Are we going to Springfield to go Christmas shopping before we leave?"Daddy actually wound up taking me into St. Louis to shop for my grandparents and all of my other relatives on my mother's side of the family. It was the best time I had had in the four years we were in Misery.A week before Christmas found daddy and me at the airport in St. Louis early in the morning. We had sent the presents on by mail and most of our luggage was all of my clothes and a few toys for me to occupy myself for the week after Christmas. I loved flying, but the hours of waiting in an airport I have never gotten to like. The food was expensive, but not overly good, the waiting areas were crowded, and most people had long ago lost any semblance of good will towards their fellow man, or woman..
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